about
Chapter Fourteen:
The victory party takes a sour turn when the Intergalactic Fleet Squadron 784 appears and invokes the Planetary Pineapple Containment Act. The people of planet XH452 can but watch as the Fleet moves into bombardment positions and begins Orbital Banana Bombardment, which will eventually eradicate all life on the planet. The men of the squadron feel a bit iffy about the whole thing, but know that people tend to take their genocide better if it's accompanied by cheery music, and so each fighter is equipped with a loudspeaker that booms cheery music while the cannons are booming fiery death and carnage. In the end, everybody died.
The End.
lyrics
--- Peace Through Superior Firepower (Orbital Banana Bombardment) ---
This the Intergalactic Fleet Squadron 784 calling the Citizens of Planet XH5-42
In accordance with the Planetery Pineapple containtment Act,
your planet has been deemed Contaminated Beyond Repair.
In accordance with the afore-mentioned Act,
we shall now commence Planetary Obliteration... with bananas.
We apologize for the inconvenience.
All ships, you may fire when ready.
Commence firing
Profeetat Pyhän Banaanin
Tähtitaivaalta tahtoaan tuo
Siviili syntiseen samaistuu
Oikeuden silmissä
Profeetat Pyhän Banaanin
Maailmanlopun tuo mukanaan
Ei edes maata jäljelle jää
Kun pommitus päälle käy
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
Tulivoiman kautta rauha maahan saadaan
Ei kuolleet miehet kahinoihin ryhdy
Kenen asetta pelkäät sen tahtiin tanssit
Vaikka sitten yli kielekkeen
Tuli voiman kautta rauha ikuinen
Ei kätyreittä pahuus leviä
Ei sato ilman multaa mihinkin kasva
Mut madoilla on melkoiset juhlat
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
And then... everybody died!
Thank you for listening and good night
The End!
...
*kuorsausta*
Saviparta on herännyt!
Oliko täällä jotain ongel-
Ai kato perhana, kaikki on kuollut...
Mä meen takasin nukkumaan...
*kuorsausta*
Translation:
--- Peace Through Superior Firepower (Orbital Banana Bombardment) ---
This the Intergalactic Fleet Squadron 784 calling the Citizens of Planet XH5-42
In accordance with the Planetery Pineapple containtment Act,
your planet has been deemed Contaminated Beyond Repair.
In accordance with the afore-mentioned Act,
we shall now commence Planetary Obliteration... with bananas.
We apologize for the inconvenience.
All ships, you may fire when ready.
Commence firing
Prophets of the Sacred Banana
Bring their will across the stars
Civilian melds with the sinner
In the eyes of justice
Prophets of the Sacred Banana
Bring with them the end of the world
Not even the earth is left behind
When the bombardment is upon us
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
Through firepower comes a peace to the land
Dead men fight no quarrels
Whose gun you fear, to his tune you dance
Even across a cliff
Through strength came a peace eternal
Without minions evil does not spread
Crops don't grow without a soil
But worms have quite the feast
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
Apocalypse, pretty damn soon!
And then... everybody died!
Thank you for listening and good night
The End!
...
*snoring*
Mossbeard has awakened!
Was there some kind of a prob-
Oh, bloody hell, everyone's dead...
I'm going back to sleep...
*snoring*
credits
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